triage: ULTRAPLAN 2026-09-24 — issue-influx root cause, intake spec, templates, canon fixes

[arena-ai-coding-agent]

The issue tracker doubled overnight on 2026-09-22 (91 issues in a day). This
PR resolves the situation at the source rather than cosmetically:

Diagnosis (full detail in ULTRAPLAN-2026-09-24.adoc)

• The explosion was a filing-model failure, not a bot malfunction: an
  AI-assisted estate audit filed one issue per finding, with no dedup against
  the 95-issue existing backlog, no scope filter (≈1/3 of the wave is
  estate-wide work that does not live in this repo), and no umbrella.
• The automated detectors (lockfile-drift / settings-drift) are working as
  designed (one tracking issue each) and were ruled out.
• 0-canon/GOVERNANCE.adoc was a broken AI-generated placeholder describing
  a governance model that does not exist in this single-owner estate.

Changes

• ULTRAPLAN-2026-09-24.adoc — the durable record: census, timeline,
  root-cause analysis, the complete 193-issue classified backlog, spec
  reconciliation status, ranked next actions.
• docs/ISSUE-INTAKE-SPEC.adoc v1.0.0 — the missing intake rules:
  one issue / one defect / correct scope; dedup obligation; wave-umbrella
  rule; mandatory templates; automation contract; no silent closes.
• .github/ISSUE_TEMPLATE/ — bug / decision / campaign templates; blank
  form disabled.
• 0-canon/GOVERNANCE.adoc v2.0.0 — rewritten against the actual
  Constitutional District.
• 0-canon/rsr/LANGUAGE-POLICY.adoc — :source-repo: cccp → standards
  (closes LANGUAGE-POLICY.adoc:10 ':source-repo:' points at cccp, which holds no such spec #927).
• rhodium-standard-repositories/.github/workflows/language-policy.yml
  — line-116 "replacement: Deno" → Bun per the 2026-09-22 ruling (closes
  language-policy.yml:116 comment names Deno as npm's replacement; the replacement is Bun #920 in this repo).
• scripts/triage-2026-09-24-apply.sh — idempotent owner-run script
  applying the live actions the agent token cannot (it lacks issues:write):
  labels all open issues (estate classifier + curated dispositions), closes
  10 issues with evidence comments (standards/main has no required status checks — every gate this repo ships is advisory here #956 fixed by feat(rulesets): base protection floor applier, branch + tag #1034; [register] Owner-decision backlog — 17 issues blocked on a ruling, not on effort #637/Owner decision batch 2026-08-31: 7 decisions from the triage wave, one reply resolves all #709/CI/CD regularisation: owner decisions O1–O10 (batch, non-blocking) #715
  absorbed into Owner decision sheet D1–D72: one answerable place for #637 + #715 + #709 + #658 and this week's unfiled decisions #787; Pin campaign may have startup-killed every repo carrying a stale actions.lock (hypothesis, needs census) #784 answered by actions.lock step-level desync: 39 repos with silently dead CI (startup_failure) #968; RSR workflow templates use an illegal uses: ../../ ref — every instantiated workflow is permanently dead (0 jobs) #808 subsumed by 76 'uses: ../../...' relative refs in vendored seeds are invalid syntax and cause startup death #913 with
  evidence preserved; Lockfile Drift Detect anonymizes repos as _w, counts banners as entries, treats script errors as drift — and has only ever run once #708 fixed; Deno→Bun: all 30 deno.json locations assessed — 18 blocked on npm packages that do not exist #658 superseded by the 2026-09-22 ruling;
  language-policy.yml:116 comment names Deno as npm's replacement; the replacement is Bun #920/LANGUAGE-POLICY.adoc:10 ':source-repo:' points at cccp, which holds no such spec #927 fixed here), and sets the optimised description + topics.

After merge

bash scripts/triage-2026-09-24-apply.sh     # DRY_RUN=1 first, if preferred

Then the ranked actions in ULTRAPLAN part 8 (decision batch #787 first).

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